Happy New Year

2008. It seems so odd to write 2008 after a year of writing 2007. It's a small change, though, compared to the bigger changes life has brought. A year ago mom was still able to walk, make fairly coherent sentences, and lived rather happily in a less restricted independent living facility. One bad fall and broken hip later and she was in a wheelchair living in an Alzheimer's facility.

We have had to make tremendous adjustments in our expectations. Before, it was a good day if mom didn't call on the phone and beg us to come and get her so she would have something to do. Now, it's a good day if she doesn't wail or call out, "Oh God, help me, help me". Any meaningful conversation is a thing of the past. While she does have moments of clarity, usually she speaks in a jumbled conglomeration of words. We know that we shouldn't upset her so we often agree with her, no matter what she says. Sometimes, we guess wrong and she becomes alarmed. "What? You don't think so?" Then we scramble for the right answer, "oh, I mean yes, definitely". I have never lied so much in my life. The best times are when we witness her saying something that makes sense. She can be so funny. Recently, on her 92nd birthday we put the cake in front of her and told her to make a wish. She was struggling to come up with something. I remember telling her to "make a wish, make a wish before the candles burn out". I told her to wish for something just for herself and not waste her wish on world peace as someone else could worry about that. After much thought, she finally said , " I wish the ice cream would hurry up and get here!"